Nucleep
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Post by Nucleep on Nov 30, 2016 0:16:02 GMT
This is a TLIAW that was locked on AH.com and so I'm doing a total reboot here as a fully fledged timeline, and it should be hopefully less political a TL than last time. SS means "Slightly Satirical". The original can be seen here.
And thus, we begin again! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A certain man wakes up in the White House. Yes, he expected that, given that he had gone to sleep in the White House the night before. But this was a completely different bedroom. The technology was all outdated. And as he woke up, the first thing he thought, even before seeing any of that, was Why the heck can't I feel my legs? He opened his eyes, and as he looked out the window... It was really hard to see outside, what without his glasses (since when did he need those?). He then reached for them as if it was second nature, although he had never done so before. He finds a note at the foot of his bed, and he reached to pick it up. "Hello, Mr. President," it reads. "I see you've waken up now. I congratulate your victory on becoming President of the United States. But there's always a catch to it - the date is, shall I say, one that will live in infamy. What you do will make or break America, so you better do something fast! I believe Congress is expecting you at 12:30! Oh yeah, about your money, it's safe in a bank account somewhere. You can take it all back or something. I don't know, you do you! Sincerely, your friendly multidimensional investor." Realization dawned on him. For all of his lack of history knowledge, he knew what that meant - it was the day Pearl Harbor was attacked. Does it matter when it was? No. But he knew that this was a very different world, one that would be more receptive to his policies but where his actual remarks would be seen as the ramblings of an insane man... not unlike a certain dictator in Germany. And it was one that is only now recovering from an economic disaster that wrecked the livelihoods of much of the nation, and thus was still firmly anti-war. And only moments later would an aide come in, yelling "Mr. President, Mr. President," and gives him a newspaper that said "JAPAN BOMBS PEARL HARBOR". For the first time since what he thought was the election, Donald Trump was genuinely unsure of what to do. Especially since everybody thought he was Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
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Nucleep
New Member
Earth Inhabitant
Posts: 7
Pronouns: He
Gender (Custom): Man
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Post by Nucleep on Dec 8, 2016 1:50:42 GMT
Chapter 2: The War Begins
At 12:30 PM that day, President 'Roosevelt' made a speech to Congress following the attack on Hawaii. It was very infamous for its amateurishness and spontaneous wording. Unfortunately for Donald-in-FDR, he had forgotten his notes and couldn't remember how the speech went. So this was what he said instead:
"My fellow Americans. I had a speech prepared, but this time I will speak from my heart. Yesterday is a day that will live in infamy. We have been attacked, by the Japs no less! They have gone and bombed our grand naval base in Hawaii! An attack on our own soil! We have not suffered such an attack for over 100 years. We must open our eyes, and see that we don't win anymore. The Japs, the Nazis, they're all at our door, knocking. Yesterday, we were at peace. In fact, they are still saying we are at peace despite THEIR bombers attacking OUR ships at Pearl Harbor. It's obvious this was part of their master plan to take us over. Look at their immigration recently! When Japan sends its people here, they're not sending its best. They're not sending you, they're sending people that have lots of problems and they're bringing those problems to our great nation. They're bringing bombs, they're bringing war. They're spies and some, I assume, are good people. But the majority of them are stealing our secrets and probably revealing them to their Emperor. It is obvious to anybody that their hatred is beyond comprehension. Our country cannot be the victims of horrendous attacks by people that believe only in Bushido, and have no sense of reason or respect for human life. Not only are they freely able to go into our lands they could terrorize us with their attacks! We don't win anymore. Look at them Japs, while we were wallowing in this Great Depression, them and the Nazis, their economy was booming. It's time for us to win again. I say we go there and we kill every last one of them. Not just the soldiers, but their families as well, believe me. I say we bomb the s*** out of them, and boom, boom, boom, we'll be done! This war will bring jobs back to America, not just for the soldiers, but also for the manufacturing sector. I will restore law and order to our country. And when we win, and we will win big, bigger than ever before, believe me, I will make America great again.
Thank you, and God bless America."
Congress, not to mention the entire American public, was genuinely shocked at the President shouting obscenities. Many a person fainted when he said those words.
Despite that speech, Congress near-unanimously voted for the war. Not long after, Trump had signed the declaration of war against all three of the Axis powers, taking care to sign under FDR's name and not his own. Unlike our own TL, both Germany and Italy were on the declaration, as he wanted them out.
Immediately, Trump called for the American bombing of both Japanese and German lands, which would be followed by an invasion, despite not knowing about the situation at all.
Meanwhile in Germany, when Adolf Hitler heard about the US declaration of war, he famously remarked "That guy must be crazy..."
The next few years will be very interesting indeed...
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